Does He Like Me? 10 Signs That Show He's Totally Into You

Does he like me?

It’s the age-old question that was on your lips as you pondered with your girlfriends at the back of the classroom whether your crush was vibing on you too, and decades later, nothing has changed.

Whether you’re in your teens, twenties, thirties, forties, fifties, or beyond, you might still find yourself wondering if the guy you like is into you. Maybe he’s an old friend. Maybe you’ve been chatting for a while on a dating site. Or maybe you bump into him in your local coffee shop each weekend say hey. No matter who he is or how you know him, it can be challenging to know whether it’s just friends or something more.

He likes me…

He likes me not…

Does he like me back?

Just get me off this rollercoaster already and let me know either way!

Maybe you thought a guy was interested in the past only to put yourself out there and find out he was playing you or already had a girlfriend. And this left you feeling rejected, embarrassed, and second-guessing your intuition. You’re afraid you’re going to get burned again, and you want to be a hundred percent sure you’re on the same page before you let yourself catch real feelings.

I completely understand where you’re coming from, which is why I want to share with you some of the subtle behaviors and actions men will display when they’re romantically interested in a woman.

Although we struggle more to make sense of our emotions and display them than you ladies, we’re pretty simple creatures at heart. So if we like you, chances are we’ll be making it obvious (while delusionally thinking we’re playing it oh-so-cool).

How do I know if he likes me? Here are the signs to look out for.

If you’re wondering does he like me through text, pay attention to how and when he texts you.

Whether through texts, dating apps, or social media, when a guy likes you, he will text you often, and it won’t just be after 10 PM.

You’ll hear from him during the day, and he won’t be afraid to reach out first or double text you.

But resist the urge of being swept up in text marathons too soon and remember my Little Love Step #5: Pace the progression of your connections.

Before you say it, I know what you’re thinking: if he’s not interested, why does he contact me at all?!

For so many different reasons. He’s bored. He wants his ego stroked. Or he’s trying to make another woman jealous.

The next time you’re around this man, observe what he’s communicating with body language. But don’t expect him to do the same things you do with your body when you’re attracted to someone. Men have their own way of showing that they’re interested.

Does he lean in when you talk?

Find excuses to touch your arm, hand, or hair?

Does he touch his face?

Stand close to you?

Part or lick his lips?

Does he stand up taller than usual?

Does he turn his body to face you?

These are all signs he likes you! So the next time you’re wondering does he like me, get out of your head and pay attention to how he’s acting. He may not say it in words, but his body will tell you everything you need to know.

Feel-good hormones are released in our bodies when we like someone, giving us a rush of excitement, pleasure, and happiness.

So when a guy likes you, he will tend to be happy, goofy, and giddy when he’s around you. Think big smiles, lots of laughter, and general good times—even when you’re just hanging out and not doing anything particularly exciting. He’s simply happy being in your company.

While eyes are certainly part of body language, they deserve their mention here as you try to discern: does he like me?

Does he maintain eye contact to the point where you feel you’re having a staring contest? Do his eyes light up when you enter a room? Does he frequently blink at you as if dazzled by your majestic beauty?

You may want to get a little closer to this guy to check out one thing: how dilated his pupils are. Researchers at the University of Kent found that people’s pupils dilate when they see a photo of someone they’re attracted to. And it doesn’t matter if they’re clothed or naked: same result. So check out his eyes to see if his pupils are big black saucers.

You take a sip… he takes a sip.

You touch your head… he touches his head.

You cross your legs… he crosses his legs.

Mirroring behavior is a scientifically proven illustration of attraction. It may be a subconscious communication of flattery. Likely he doesn’t even realize he’s doing it. But if the guy you’re talking to mirrors you at least a few times, he probably is interested.

Test it out! Do something unexpected like cross your arms or lean forward and see if he follows suit.

If he’s a shy, introverted, lacking in confidence kind of guy, he might become incredibly awkward around you if he’s attracted to you.

He’s trying so hard to make a great impression when he’s around you that he ends up putting on a “performance” in an attempt to please you. Maybe he rehearses stories to share or jokes to tell you. Perhaps he’s into BIG, bold gestures to get you to notice him. Or maybe he struggles to look you in the eye or ends up being super clumsy when he’s with you. These are all signs of awkwardness.

Have you noticed the guy in question has done something different with his hair, bought a new shirt, or started wearing more aftershave? If he’s making an extra special effort with his appearance, it’s a sign he’s trying to impress you because he likes you.

And effort can show up in lots of ways. Does he make an effort to make you laugh, take you somewhere fun to hang out, or help you when you need it?

A man’s actions will tell you so much more than his words ever will.

Unless someone has died, get up and LEAVE if a man answers his phone while on a date with you. You deserve so much better than that.

We all spend way too much time on our phones these days. So when a guy is with you, and his phone stays locked away in his pocket, this means he’s more interested in you than his phone, which is a GREAT sign. His attention is on you. Those DMs can wait.

No one likes hearing someone they’re attracted to talk about people they’re dating or have dated in the past. If he’s talking about other girls, this is a major red flag that he doesn’t like you. And if he drops his ex into the conversation a lot, chances are he’s not entirely over her.

Don’t excuse this behavior by thinking he’s trying to make you jealous. Good guys won’t ever do this—it’s a sign he’s trying to manipulate you.

If a man genuinely likes you, he will focus entirely on YOU, not other women.

When you’re around a man you like, you may be so nervous that you overlook what he says… but you should pay attention.

Beyond it just being a common courtesy to listen to someone when they’re talking to you, what he’s saying can give you some clues as to where his heart is at.

That dress looks beautiful on you.

Does he tell you that you look nice or otherwise compliment you? Pay attention! Too many women brush off compliments because they aren’t fully open to receiving. Stop for a moment. Hear the compliment. Accept it and say thank you.

Men do not compliment women they’re not into (unless it’s their mom). If he’s complimenting you, it’s because he’s paying attention. If he’s paying attention, he’s interested.

Ah, cool, I’m really into acro-yoga too!

Wise up, girl! This man is trying to show you that you have things in common. The Similarity-Attraction Theory says that rather than opposites attracting, often its similarities that do, so if this man is pointing out all that you have in common, it’s for good reason: because he’s attracted to you!

Yea, I’m not doing anything this weekend…

Um, hello? Most people wouldn’t own up to having a blank calendar, so clearly, he’s letting you know he’s available to go out. He might be unsure if you’re interested in him, so he hasn’t pulled the trigger to formally ask you out. But what are you waiting for? If you like him too, make plans with him.

Is he always asking you questions? Do they go beyond surface-level small-talk and move the conversation to a deeper level?

If he asks you more than, “how are you?” or “how was work?” and opts for more interesting, open-ended questions, it’s because he’s genuinely interested in getting to know you more intimately.

He wants to know who you are on a soul level, what your biggest dreams are, how your mind works, your quirks and flaws, how you got to where you are today, and where you hope to go.

If you end up in really long, deep conversations, and he’s listening to everything you’re saying, there’s a strong chance this man likes you.

Have you been thinking, does he like me more than a friend, or has he already friend-zoned me without me noticing? If so, this sign will tell you everything you need to know.

Now, I don’t mean inappropriate, unwanted touches—those are CREEPY, and don’t be afraid to tell him to back the hell up. But if the two of you have built up enough of a connection or you’re on a date and sparks are flying, there are times when he might instinctively touch you in a subtle way, and this is a sign he’s into you.

For example, he might lightly graze your back as you walk through a door he opened for you. If you’re sitting next to each other at a table, he might gently brush your leg with his. Maybe he’s into palm reading and will ask if he can read yours.

I’m telling you, these subtle touches are no accident. And if you like him back, don’t be afraid to subtly touch him back.

Maybe the guy you’ve got your eye on is part of your circle of friends, and you’re not sure if he’s being friendly like he is to everyone or if it’s something more.

Does he hug you when he meets you? If so, does he hug everyone else?

Does he always make an effort to spend solo time with you? And does he do this with the others?

Is all his communication inside of a group text, or does he send you private texts too?

Moving from being friends (especially when you’re part of a bigger crew) to something more can be tricky. Ask others in the group for their insights on how he’s treating you… or even ask them to talk to him to get the skinny about how he feels.

You never ran into this guy until you started wondering does he like me, and suddenly he’s EVERYWHERE.

He’s picking up his dry cleaning when you’re dropping yours off.

He’s at a party where you didn’t realize you had friends in common.

He’s frequenting your favorite coffee shop.

Unless he’s going overboard in popping up where you are (stalker much??), he may be trying to get your attention by being near you.

Editor’s note: Ready to attract love with a proven strategy? Watch this free video to learn the 7 powerful steps

Use the opportunity to make a joke of it:

We’ve GOT to stop meeting like this!

Are you following me?!

It’s no secret that men use humor as a way to impress women they’re attracted to. This comes naturally to some of us, while others need a little more practice at open-mic night. But whether he’s succeeding or not, if he’s trying to make you laugh, it’s probably because he likes you.

It’s a real ego boost when a woman we’re attracted to finds us funny, and we can’t get enough of seeing you smile and hearing your laugh.

Yea, I like volunteering with sick kids in my spare time…

Notice whether he toots his own horn a bit. It could be because he wants you to notice him and his general awesomeness.

Now, there’s a fine line between a guy just trying to get you to know a few cool things about him and being a total narcissist, so use your judgment here to decide which one he is. Generally, if he’s bragging about money, possessions, or women, these are red flags.

Teasing is a great strategy to let someone know you’re interested. If you’re wondering why a guy is constantly poking fun at you, it might be because he likes you but doesn’t know a more sophisticated way to let you know.

Think back to grade school when Bobby always pulled your pigtails. He was totally into you, wasn’t he? Hopefully, this guy’s got better game than Bobby did, but the message is the same: he’s telling you he finds you attractive and wants your attention.

If you’re wondering, does he like me, pay attention to how comfortable he is being vulnerable with you. A man who is willing to open up, share personal details, and express his emotions with you is a man who trusts you. Men won’t open up to just anyone, especially when it comes to those more challenging emotions that we’ve been taught to hide at all costs out of fear of appearing weak.

If he’s able and willing to open up to you, he has a connection with you that he doesn’t have with many people.

Next time you’re pondering does he have feelings for me, think about whether he remembers things you tell him or not.

A man who likes you romantically will always actively listen during your conversations because they genuinely care. The best way to spot the difference is to notice if he remembers the things you tell him.

For example, if you tell him about a big project you’ve got going on at work with an upcoming deadline, does he check in nearer the deadline and offer you words of encouragement?

Or if you tell him you hate watching scary movies, does he remember this when you’re picking a movie to watch and say, “don’t worry, we’re not gonna watch that cos I know you don’t like scary movies.”

These are classic signs that he’s paying attention to what you’re saying and remembering little details because they’re important to him; you’re important to him.

Does he go out of his way to do nice things for you?

I mean, does he ask you how your kids are or remember your lunch order because it’s what you get every time you go to that deli? Does he offer to carry your shopping bags, open doors for you, or lend you his jacket when you’re cold? Does he offer to pay for coffee on your first date, text you to make sure you got home okay, or send you a bunch of flowers on a random Tuesday morning just to let you know he’s thinking of you?

These are all examples of tiny, sweet gestures that show you this man cares about you enough to go out of his way to be kind to you.

YES.

We get jealous when we think we’re going to lose something important to us. So, if he’s always looking over when you’re chatting to other guys or asking you about dates you’ve been on recently, this could be his jealous side making an appearance.

If there’s a guy you like who isn’t making a move on you and you want to know whether he likes you, dating other guys can be a brilliant way to get him to act sooner rather than later. Of course, don’t play games or toy with him, but keep your options open and date lots of guys until one of them makes it crystal clear that he wants to be with you exclusively (otherwise known as Little Love Step #6).

If you’ve been dating a guy and you’re wondering, does he like me, bring your attention to his level of respect for your personal boundaries.

For example, if you’ve told him you don’t kiss anyone until at least the third date and he’s trying to kiss you on date number one, this is a red flag. On the other hand, if you’ve been open about wanting to wait until you’re in love again before you have sex, and he tells you he respects that and doesn’t pressure you into anything, this is a sign he respects your boundaries, and he respects you.

A man who likes you will always respect your boundaries.

I don’t know why women don’t think men get nervous around them! When I first started dating Jess, I was nervous. Every. Single. Time. I. Saw. Her.

Eventually, that faded away (thank goodness), but it’s perfectly natural for a man who’s into you to exhibit a bit of jittery behavior.

Maybe he talks 90-to-nothing around you. Maybe the cat has his tongue.

Or maybe he deliberately ignores you in a group but is constantly making eyes at you.

Maybe he spills his drink. Trips on the sidewalk. Face-plants into a door.

If you think his behavior isn’t normal, you’re probably right. And the answer to the whole does he like me question? Already answered.

A man with your best interests at heart will support and champion you to be your best self and achieve your biggest goals and dreams. Whether you want to go back to school, travel Europe, run a marathon, or start a business, he wants you to do what you love, and he wants to see you kill it.

So if he’s always one of the people encouraging you to follow your dreams, this is a vital sign he likes you.

It’s not that he thinks you’re helpless and unable to take care of yourself—he knows you can. But he wants to help you any way he can and fix any potential problem you have because this is what we do. It’s hardwired into our DNA. We want to take care of women and protect them from potential danger.

So if you like this guy too, step into your feminine energy (Little Love Step #1) and let him help you now and then.

If he introduces you to his friends (and family), this is a red hot sign that he likes you as more than a friend. Men won’t introduce random people to their nearest and dearest.

Friends who know the guy is into you may treat you differently than they would if you were “one of the guys,” i.e., just a friend.

They may back away from the two of you if you’re out together to give you some alone time. They may talk him up to make sure you know what a great catch he is. And they will also be damn sure they don’t flirt with you.

If you know them well, you could even take one aside and ask if the guy likes you!

If you’re into online quizzes, take the does he like me quiz right here and see if it’s the real deal.

If he’s displaying a ton of the signs above, and you like this guy too, don’t be afraid to make the first move and ask him if he wants to grab a cup of coffee with you. Keep it casual, and don’t put any pressure on the outcome. If it turns out he doesn’t feel that way, there’s no love lost. Embrace the rejection, be proud of yourself for going for it, and move on to the next guy.

Dating and relationships require us to be vulnerable, so the earlier you master this skill, the stronger your connections will be. I know it’s scary, but what’s scarier: putting your heart on the line and risking rejection or staying so guarded that nobody ever gets to know you?

Are you wondering whether a guy in your life likes you? Tell me all about it in the comments below.

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